I did it. I have been cheating. I t feels awful, but i can't stop. I feel like I need him, like I'm addicted to him..... I can't bare it,
sneaking around, lying, coming home smelling of him seeing the look on my mums face when she smells the old sent of unbelievably passionate.... consuming..... dirty...... cruel and overwhelmingly deep sex on my skin. I smell like him all the time now, he is engraved in my skin like a permanent fragrance. No matter how hard i scrub afterwards i can still smell him on me. I can still see the bite marks and the feel the bruises from his grip forming on my wrists thighs and neck. Hiding the bruises from James is the worst part, being unable to allow him to kiss me or hold me, feeling dirty and horrid all the time is making me miserable. But i can't stop, he's like heroine. He completely in my system this unshakable force gripping onto every inch of my skin, and pulling me down into my own filthy pit of lust and desire. Feeling him kiss my neck and squeeze my wrists as he holds me do
wn on his bed. Always his bed. Always his place. He bites and tugs at every inch of me refusing to release this hold he has this power over me, I can deny him nothing. I am completely submissive to his desire and his lust while he takes everything from me, takes it all to slack his lust for that brief time, then sends me away only to be called back a few days later for more of the same dirty filth. More Submission. More Lust. More Guilt.
